You felt like home. You smelt familiar. You felt comfortable. I would have done anything for you. But you are an idiot. You didn’t want this as much as I did. You used me. And now I hate you. I wish I had never met you.

First impressions count, and so do last impressions. I can’t believe I was so stupid. I stopped using my head and let you try and walk all over me. I pray to Allah that you get what you deserve, and that one day you think back on this day and realise what an idiot you are. I know there is someone out there for me, and now he’s getting closer.

Why does he make me feel like this?

Like I’m in-between.. unsure.. unsure if he actually cares

tsamthepoet:

Never ever ever ever ever ever underestimate the power of a prayer. When it is finally answered your heart will taste its sweetness. Alhamdulillah.

kesandor:

Being attracted to men is an endless cycle of “Wow he’s good looking” and watching that man do the absolute most to show you he’s hideous on the inside.

I apologised. Took the first step. Was the bigger person. And you shocked me. You have shocked me. Apparently I’m not as good of a judge of character as I always thought I was. Some people are so cruel. You talked about Islam like it was so important to you but you don’t even know what Islam is.

I learnt my lesson. Never again.

I’m sorry. I’m sorry I couldn’t compromise. I’m sorry I don’t dress well enough for you. I’m sorry you don’t think I follow Islam as well as you.

I never thought I would meet someone like you, especially because of how we met. I never thought I would fall so deep. Thank you for being so kind. Thank you for my first kiss. It was soft but I could still feel your prickly beard on my face. I’m sorry I made it awkward. Thank you for making me feel so good.

I wish things were different. I wish you could change your mind.

I’ve never felt so comfortable and elated at the same time with a man. I’ve never felt so close to someone. I’ve never thought seriously about marrying someone before I met you.

I love how strong you are and how intelligent you are. I love your spontaneity and your charm and humour. I loved your sincerity.

I hope I meet someone like you again. I hope next time he likes my clothes and is able to enjoy what I wear. I hope he is also kind. I hope he gives me butterflies like you.

-S